Twelve Days of Andromeda
by Amberstar of Thunderclan
Summary: Our story is complete. It's time to say farewell... A countdown to Mass Effect: Andromeda(much less cheesy than it sounds)! A trolling Garrus, bombtastic Solana, Tali being a bad influence on Legion, and conversations between drunk Elcor await!
1. Day 1

**On the first day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **A Hamster in a pantry!**

Miranda was always the first up. She had a whole extra few hours of duties to set before the day began; put up the duty rosters, check the latest reports, check in with the Illusive Man, make sure Garrus Vakarian or Kasumi Goto hadn't left any 'presents' behind last night...

And she could enjoy her coffee in relative peace before all the 'riff-raff' were fully awake. She took a sip of hot mocha, and sank into her seat with a sigh. This was the only time of day(or night-shift, depending on how you looked at it) in which the Normandy was one-hundred percent, completely peaceful. _Why can't it be like this all the time?_

A crash from behind the kitchen counter, more things shifting afterwards. Miranda's cup dropped away from her mouth as a frown replaced her peaceful smile. _Oh, yes;_ that's _why._ She set her drink on the table, and walked towards the kitchen with pursed lips, noting the sound of the elevator door opening as she did so.

Going behind the counter, she found several pans and pots on the floor as Garrus walked in, mandibles parted in a wide yawn that allowed for the light to flash along his fangs. The patch of gauze pasted to the side of his head looked a little lopsided, and was likely in need of replacing, and the hud of his ever-present visor was off for now. Bleary-eyed and half asleep, he looked perfectly innocent. 'Looked'.

"Vakarian, what did you do?" he looked at her in surprise, his fringe spiking a little.

"I swear, whatever it was... Legion did it." She fixed him with a narrow-eye glare, and he stared back at her steadily. She opened her mouth to tell him that the _Geth_ was more mature than the Turian, when she heard another shifting coming from the pantry under the counter. Jaws set, she bent down and jerked the door open...

And screamed.

Something furry and brown and white seemed to fly out of the cabinet, away from the spilled sunflower seeds, and scurried across the floor, squeaking in terror as she tried to stomp on it. Garrus let out an alarmed yelp, and dove to stop her foot from crashing down on the small creature, knocking her hand out of the way while clapping his other hand onto the small being with predatory reflexes.

"Stop! Stop! It's Hammy!" he shouted, fringe flattening as she cooled down her biotics. He lifted the still squealing animal with both hands, keeping firm grip on it with his talons. Heat rose up to her face.

"Hammy?" she questioned through grit teeth as the hamster writhed in the Turian's grip. He cupped his hands over it and held it close to his chest to keep it from escaping, relaxing his grip only enough so that it didn't escape.

"Yeah. Hammy the space hamster? Shepard's pet?" he told her. "He escaped last night? Remember?"

"No, I don't. In fact, I don't recall the Commander ever having a pet to begin with." she clenched her fists, trying to keep her biotic under control with how angry and embarrassed she was. Her own scream still rang in her ears. Thank goodness his visor hadn't been on...

"Really?" he tipped his head. "Well, the fish... didn't work out, so I suggested she get a lizard instead. So she got a hamster. You might want to be more careful; she might not forgive you if you were to kill her Hammy..."

"Just get the animal back in it's cage, Garrus!" she snapped. He shrugged, winking at her before walking away back to the elevator. But before he was out of sight, he froze, fringe spiking once more.

"Oh, shoot!" he exclaimed. "I forgot about Legion!"

He took off in a run for the elevator. "EDI, tell me he didn't take me literally last night!"

"What does he mean by that, EDI?" Miranda asked out loud.

"When Commander Shepard's hamster broke loose, Garrus and Legion went looking for it in engineering. Garrus was referring to the point in which he said, and I quote, 'we've got to search the vents; don't come out till you find him, Shepard'll have our heads if he isn't back in his cage by morning'." the AI clarified. Miranda sighed, rubbing her forehead with one hand.

"So Legion is still in the vents..." she breathed. "Call up Tali; tell her to keep an eye on the systems in case he trips something by accident."

"Shall I arrange for 'Lost Geth' posters to be placed around the ship?" EDI asked. The XO spared a raised eyebrow in the direction of the AI's blue avatar coming from a nearby console. "That was a joke."

* * *

 **Okay, so I did this for Destiny when Rise of Iron was coming out, and since people really liked that fic, I decided to do it for Andromeda. This is really a final nod to the trilogy characters; _this_ is the true goodbye, not ME3. **

**Anyway, let me know what you guys think, and look forwards to tomarrows posting! Shepard and Garrus are going to grind it out on Galaxy of Fantasy!**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	2. Day 2

**On the second day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Two nerds 'a gaming!**

"Say 'cheese', cause' you're about to get your head shot!"

"Oh yeah? Well I hope you like the taste of your own butt, because that's what you're getting handed for dinner!"

"Hey, have you ever noticed that if you say, I'm gonna 'insert made-up verb' your 'insert made-up noun,' everything sounds like a really rude alien insult? Like, I'm gonna cybernize your thrusters!"

"I'm gonna galafret your tonatron!"

"I'm gonna cryptify your proto-eggs with this sword!"

"HA! Shaderoll!" Shepard crowed triumphantly, as her character dodged his blow. She drew her bow and let a bolt of energy fly, disintegrating Garrus' character. She whooped, and slugged him in the shoulder as he drooped. "Score's thirty-two!"

"Shepard-Commander, we fail to see the point of unsportsmanlike conduct." Legion said from where she'd had him sit down to observe.

"Legion, everybody does smack talk when they're gaming." Garrus waved one talon in a circle as if were obvious. Shepard took a long slerp from the straw of her soda.

"Yeah, it's all in good fun." she added.

"We do not use 'smack talk'." the Geth commented.

"Legion, the most gamer-ish thing we've seen you do is backseat game." At this the Geth looked at the ceiling, like he had some sort of dirty little secret. Both turian and Human ignored this, and instead returned their focus back to the game. Today, they had decided it was time to school Legion in the way things were done when one had some of that mystical anomaly called 'free time'. Shepard was tired of, and a little unhappy, about the amount of time the Geth platform spent just standing in the AI Core doing literally nothing.

"We do not understand. When have we done this?" Both of them twisted around to look at him blankly in a 'really?' sort of way.

"That time when you kept nagging Kasumi while she was playing a match-three game."

"That time when you spent three hours complaining to Mordin about his gear loadout in Alliance Corsair. You don't even game!"

"That time Tali threw her controller at you because you told her there was no point in leveling Aerith up because she was going to die later anyway."

"We were merely stating a logical fact. Creator Zorah's actions were unjustified."

"She was fifteen minute into the game and you gave away major spoilers! That's like walking to a room full of non-Humans watching Harry Potter and yelling 'Snape kills Dumbledore'!"

"Yea-wait, what!?" Garrus looked at her with a shocked expression, and she winced. "Snape does _what_!?"

"Ummm... sorry. I thought you already watched that one." she apologized. Glaring, Garrus lunged, and she yelped as he snatched the cheese puffs from her side and held them out of reach.

"Garrus!" she tried to tackle the larger sapient, grabbing at the barrel to no avail. "Give me my cheese puffs! I need my cheese puffs!"

"No, Sahara. And you know I'm saving you! The rule of Dr. Cheesepuff ends today!" he declared vengefully.

"Shepard-Commander, you are leaving you character idle. You will be terminated by an enemy player." Legion tried to point out. But the squabble with Garrus continued. The Geth's eye plates flicked up as his runtimes came to consensus, and he slid himself off the seat, neither organic noticing his departure from the Captain's Cabin.

Shepard was trying to pry the puffs from Garrus' arms, the Turian curled tightly on the floor with his arms wrapped around it, when it happened. "Garrus, give me my cheese puffs! I need my cheese puff fix!"

A loud explosion came from the screen, and they both jerked upright to see their character's corpses smoldering from the napalm-assisted rocket blast.

 _Infiltrat0rN7 killed HylianMaster777 and ScopedAndDr0pped36._ Both Turian and Human looked at each other witheringly as Infiltrat0r's avatar came and teabagged on their ashes before running off again.

"Truce?" Garrus offer the cheese puffs. Shepard took them from him, set them on the floor in front of her, and shook his hand.

"Let's get 'im." she agreed. They respawned, and gave chase to their murderer.

Consensus had been that proving his point would get Garrus Vakarian and Shepard-Commander to resume play and discourage further idleness.

* * *

 **Because Legion is wonderful, and I always imagined this being a scene that could have happened in the How to Be a Rogue setting, in the Shepardverse side of the tale. And yes, to those of you who recognize it, that opening dialogue is a total reference to the Amazing World of Gumball episode, "The Code".**

 **And for those of you who don't know, "teabagging" is when you make you character crouch up and down on a rival player's remains. It is a source of vengeful fury for those of us who play Destiny.**

 **As I understand it, jsm never forgave Miranda for getting Tali killed in his playthrough... I'd hate her, too. Tali is fablous-FRABJOUS!**

 **Look up to tomorrow! Javik, Garrus, and Tali get down and TROLL these Humans...**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	3. Day 3

**On the third day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Three trolling aliens!**

A shout rang out across the crew deck as Javik stepped off the elevator. Soon afterwards, a rather loud sneeze, followed by laughter. He shut his top set of eyes. _Primitives._

As he rounded the corner, he saw the Turian glance slyly in his direction, eyes bird-like and mandibles parted in a grin.

"Hey Javik, have you tried it yet?" he asked eagerly. The Prothean could sense barely-contained amusement pouring out of the sniper.

"What?" he asked, humoring him.

"That planet we went to last? Remember how Shepard didn't go down because 'Humans are allergic to the atmosphere'? Well, it turns out... the mere mention of it's name, guarantees at least one Human sneezes." Javik stared at him blankly, and his fringe spiked slightly. "I'll demonstrate. ALCHIKA!"

Nothing happened. Garrus raised one talon.

"Wait for it... wait for iiiiit..."

A single sneeze sounded from somewhere behind him, and Garrus' grin widened.

"Pure. Coincidence." Javik told him. "You are wasting your time, Turian."

"Oh yeah? Hey, Tali!" Garrus called across the mess at the Quarian. "What was the name of that planet Shepard wouldn't go on again?"

"Alchika." she called back. On cue, the nearby Donnely sneezed rather violently, all over Gabby's breakfast. The Quarian looked up at Garrus, set her plate down, and made her way over while Javik once again dismissed the occurrence, sensing suspicion from the suited woman as she approached.

"Garrus, what are you doing?" she asked reproachfully.

"Nothing, my dear Tali. Just ah, talking about a planet that Humans are so allergic to they _sneeze_ at the mere mention of it's name." he told her smoothly. She crossed her arms over her chest, mirroring Javik's stance.

"Really? Are you sure it's not just a coincidence?" she asked. the Turian let out an annoyed huff, fringe spiking in annoyance.

"What do I have to do to prove it to you two? ALCHIKA, ALCHIKA, ALCHIKA!" he shouted. Javik snorted and turned to leave, only to freeze and look around as a chorus of sneezes erupted all around him, and all the nearby Humans glared at the Turian.

"Keelah..." Tali exclaimed softly.

"It's _real_!?" Javik almost laughed. Almost. It was such a pointless thing, making Humans sneeze, but he'd never heard of a word triggering such effects before, let alone the name of a planet. "In my cycle, there was no such thing as a species allergic to a _word_."

"In our cycle, we've learned to accept these weird things when they happen; there's really no point in questioning it anymore." Garrus shrugged, grinning.

"ALCHIKA!" Tali shouted. Someone sneezed in the background, and she doubled over with laughter. "Keelah, I can't believe this! We _have_ to hack the Citadel intercoms now."

"Simply for the purpose of messing with the Humans?" Javik blinked his lower set of eyes. _How immature._

"Well, you have to admit, the thought of one in ten Humans on the Citadel sneezing all at once is... awesome. Besides, didn't you once say you _loved_ teasing primitives?" the Turian pointed out. "Alchika!"

Another sneeze.

"Well, maybe it _is_ a _little_ mean to do this to them..." Tali pondered without true remorse. "Alchika!"

Yet _another_ sneeze.

"Alchika." Javik stated. A loud sneeze just behind him, a ray of irritation piercing the air.

"Really, you three?" he turned to see the Commander glowering at them, having been the victim of the allergen that he had just uttered. "Garrus, I expected. Tali, I expected to be nicer about it. _Javik_... I just thought you were more mature than this."

"It is your own fault for being allergic to a _word_." he tried. Perhaps the lamest thing a Prothean had used as an excuse in 50,000 years... or ever.

* * *

 **Because... reasons. This was originally going to be the whole squad sneezing the daylights out of themselves on a planet called Alchika, but then it turned into thisssss. I have no idea how it came to be sneezing, don't ask.**

 **Yes, time does fly. And CelticKnot, I seriously suggest giving Destiny a try; the next live event, Age of Triumph is coming up, and dare I say, rewards gained will result in some kind of bonus to players transferring to Destiny 2 later this year. If I had never started playing Destiny, I wouldn't have given Mass Effect a chance; I was never one for shooter games, but that one got my attention. A nice, clean MMO shooter that plays to my obsession with picking up shiny objects and collecting epic outfits.**

 **Look up to tomorrow; Solana's gonna blow your _minds_...**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	4. Day 4

**On the fourth day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Four dead Reapers!**

"Everything hinges on this moment. It's all up to you. So Vakarian, whatever you do... don't. Press. This. Button." Commander Thrikan told her seriously, handing Solana the trigger, uneasy at the maniacal grin she gave it. "Not until we give the signal."

"Mmmhhhhmmmm." She hummed, stroking the trigger lovingly. "Got it."

"Solana, I mean it. you press that while we're still in the zone, and everybody. Dies." he emphasized. She hovered her talon over the button.

"So why don't we press it _now_ so you don't have to go in there?" she insisted, talon lowering towards the button. He grabbed her hand.

" _NO_. We need to lure the Reapers to the blast site!" He told her.

There were two Vakarian kids. There was Garrus; famous friend of Commander Shepard, elite sniper, charmer. Then there was... Solana. Unstable explosives expert with a fetish for blowing things up, large and small. Spent time as a civilian demolitions expert, until the war hit and she was suddenly being hire to blow up not old buildings, but Reapers. Among other things.

Other things, being a volcano. Rigged with nuclear devices. An _erupting_ volcano rigged with nuclear devices, which would hopefully be taking a few Reapers with it. There were five of the massive ships dotted among the Islands they were at, all they had to do was lure them to the blast site, take out their shields from orbit, and blow them up.

"Now, get to the safe zone." he told her. As she ran gleefully to the shuttle, he turned back and yelled after her. "And remember to were protective glasses! The light will fry your eyes!"

"Whateveeerrr!" she sang back as the door to the shuttle closed. The shuttle bay opened, and the small craft left. He sighed, one hand on his forehead. _What am I going to do with that girl?_

* * *

Solana didn't care that she wasn't famous. Garrus was the big, bad, galaxy-saving butt-kicker, and she was just... 'the little sister'. She was cool with that; she hated attention anyway. And no fame meant 'no expectations', right? Oh, how father had been disappointed when she didn't join C-Sec. But he was far more accepting of her choice to blow stuff up for a living than he was of Garrus' choice to run around kicking Saren's cybernetic butt all across the galaxy with the Lion of Elysium.

 _At least mother was proud, in the end..._

She'd kicked Garrus' butt(quite literally) when he'd shown up at the clinic, _late_ , on the day their mother died. Needless to say, the butt kicking had ended in shock when she saw that the right side of his face had gotten blown off. Then, she kicked his butt again for not telling her. Then, after mother died, she kicked his butt _again_ for going through a dangerous relay on a _literal_ suicide mission.

She'd kicked her brother's butt a lot in those days. Then, the Reapers hit, she broke her leg in the escape, and now, instead of being on the ground, fighting, someone _else_ was managing _her_ explosives, and she was stuck sitting on the other end of the line with only the satisfaction of hitting the remote to appease her. _Well, I suppose it's a little fun to mess around with the solders._

She shot the shuttle pilot a wicked, predatory grin. They all thought she was crazy. She loved the looks on their faces when she did her laugh.

 _"Okay, almost there. Tell Vakarian to be ready."_ The transmission patched through. She rushed to the monitor with a squeal of delight, the camera she'd requested to be set up giving a perfect view of the volcano, and the Reapers that were closing in on it. If she tried really hard, and squinted, she could see Thrikan's ship, among multiple others.

Suddenly, the Turian ships shot way up into the atmosphere, the four slower Reaper Capitol ships trying to follow. _Only four to the party, then? Shame._

 _"Now!"_ The command came.

"We're a go!" the pilot announced at the same time. Solana punched down on the button triumphantly, laughing maniacally as the volcano erupted into glorious flames.

"BURN! HAHAHA! _BURN_! BUUUUURN!" She cried with a deranged cackle, talons curling as she shared her joy with the world. The volcano and the area around it exploded into a fiery, magma-assisted nuclear blast, the four Reapers engulfed as the entire area was violently destroyed.

And as they burned, Solana Vakarian laughed.

* * *

 **Solana the demolitions Turian has mental instability. ^^**

 **Yeah, I think we all deserve to see some explosions every once in a while. Jayfeatter has a lot of explosions in her fics; I decided it was my turn to blow up a volcano.**

 **I'm not sure whether to be flattered or concered that my 'best ME writing yet' is a bunch of impromptu one-shots that I write in 15 minutes or less every day... Personally, I think these ar rough compared to How to be a Rouge or my other one-shots.**

 **Brace yourselves; drunk Elcor are coming...**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	5. Day 5

**On the fifth day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Five, drunk Elcor!**

(Transcript recorded in Flux bar on Citadel)

R: Excitedly: did you see the new Blasto movie?

S: Joyfully: yes.

J: Boastingly: I saw that one as well. Blasto 97.

T: With exasperation: there is no Blasto 97. Uncertainly: is there?

R: With confusion: I do not know. No. Yes. Noooooo...

E: Questioningly: 'No', 'know', or 'nose'? Which one do you mean?

R: With more confusion: What?

E: ...

J: Helpfully: That was a line from the movie. Blasto says 'nooooo...'

T: With skepticism: I do not remember that part.

R: Clarification: I was not referencing a line from the movie. I was expressing that I did not know if there was a Blasto 90-67.

J: With confusion: I thought it was Blasto 97. Is there a Blasto movie we have not seen yet?

S: Excitedly: there must be. We have to go see it. Blasto 90-67.

E: Blastooooooo... nooooooo...

* * *

(Security footage from Flux dance floor)

Five Elcor staggered and howled on the dance floor, bumping into each other and moaning in baying monotones. Most of the other people that had been on the dance floor had retreated to avoid being trampled on.

Others had left the establishment simply because they got sick and tired of the chorus of Elcor singing the theme for Blasto at the tops of their lungs.

 _"And he'll sting you bad,"_

 _"And he'll sting you baaaack,"_

 _"And he'll... wing it to,"_

 _"Toooo, win the day baaaack!"_

 _"He's Blasto, ready to fight!"_

 _"Blasto, ready to bite!"_

 _"He's Blasto, he's back tonight,"_

 _"To win the rights!"_

 _"Blastoooooooooo!"_

The five of them staggered into each other as they swayed and 'danced' drunkedly, one of them(note: Erekth Val), loosing his balance, and staggering into a nearby table, falling on top of it, drinks spilling all over his body, and the two Salarians that had been sitting there glared at him, starting to yell furiously at the Elcor.

He lifted his head to give one last long, lonely cry of 'Blastoooo', before he lay limp, passed out. His companions did nothing about the situation at the Salarians took his credits as compensation for their drinks, thought they gave out, as one, a long cry of 'nooooo', before resuming their singing and staggering.

* * *

(C-Sec report: disturbance in Flux)

Cap. Tactus to Exec. Pallin;

Reported five Elcor arrested in Flux at 03:20 this morning for disturbance of the peace and disruption of commerce. Report two counts of theft by Salarian drunkards. Report one count of biotic assault by a Drell merchant. Elcor group reportedly became wasted at Flux bar, before moving to the dance floor, nearly injuring several bystanders by recklessly throwing their weight around, while singing the Blasto theme and being general nuisances. Two Salarians reported near injury when one crashed into their table(note: said Salarians soon arrested for theft of said Elcor's credit chits).

One passed out, the remaining four moved to the markets after being kicked out of the casino. They continued to howl the Blasto theme, and began harassing a Hanar salesman and his Drell compatriot, proclaiming that he was Blasto, and they were his biggest fans. When the Elcor refused to remove themselves from the premise, they resisted arrest from nearby officers. The Drell used a biotic attack on the four, knocking them out, and he has agreed to pay a fine for use of biotic hostilities.

Charges will be made later today; the five Elcor are being detained, as are the Salarians. The Drell, as previously mentioned, has agreed to pay a fine in exchange for being let off with a warning.

End report.

* * *

 **I'm so sorry guys! I meant to update yesterday, but I was having computer problems! Ah, well. Twelve Days of RoI wasn't finished on time, either. I guess it wasn't meant to be...**

 **And yes, I did try to style this like a Shadow Broker dossier, I couldn't think of any other way to present it. I tried it a few other ways, but they didn't feel right.**

 **Solana was Garrus' sister; she is named, but only ever mentioned in passing. We never really meet her. I'm glad people are enjoying this, and I'm glad to have turned Celtic on to a new game. And I hope I didn't disappoint with the drunk Elcor!**

 **Look up to next time; we take a brief flash into the life of a new character...**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	6. Day 6

**On the sixth day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Six chances taken!**

There was a loud yell of pain as the large creature slammed it's paw into it's prey, knocking it aside and pinning it to the ground. There were many bystanders, but none of them were brave enough to stop this. They knew what was happening.

They knew the routine. This one would be made an example of. None could resist.

The rider slid down from his mount. If you looked at him and his creature, you might be scared, but the prey, pinned with the beast's claws drawing spots of blood on his chest, had eyes and world only for the knife and the cruel gaze of his suppressor. If he had to choose any way to describe these wretches, it would be that gaze and that knife.

With those two things the only articles of existence in the world, the imposing figure stooped.

"Do you resist, Angara?" he purred sweetly.

"I resist." the prey confirmed, not unlocking his gaze from his attacker's. The attacker smiled, and the knife moved. The prey sucked in a breath as the blade sank into the flesh of his neck ridge.

"Do you still resist?" Hunter leaned in closer to victim.

"Yes, I still resist." His voice was tight with pain. He didn't care. The knife slipped deeper in, and cut downwards. Predator leaning closer still.

"Do you still resist, Angara?" a cruel hiss this time. If the knife moved down another inch or so, or pushed another centimeter deeper, it would hit and sever the life-pumping major artery running along the base of his neck.

He did not care.

"To my last breath." he defied. A cruel glint in his captor's eye, these wretched animals that called themselves sentient. The knife moved only a fraction before the cry split the air.

"Please, no!" For a brief moment he allowed the woman at the edge of the crowd, with the young child at her feet, enter his world to join the cruel eyes and the wicked knife. Her eyes were desperate, the child scared. She stepped forwards.

"Don't resist! Please, I beg you!" she pleaded. To the credit of the monster, it listened to her instead of ending him. "We can pay the tribute, double! J-just please...my love... don't resist. Wha-what would we do without you? We need you, _here_! With us!"

Something new entered her gaze, a silent order, rather than a plea, but then it was gone. The predator looked down at him, eyes still cruel, knife still sharp and embedded in his neck ridge. The prey closed his eyes. So be it, then.

"I... do not resist." he relented, the words foul and traitorous in his mouth.

"What do you do instead?" the predator purred, knowing, languishing in the fact he had won.

"I... bow always... to the might of your and yours... and I will pay my tribute." His voice tasted like mud, the words like grit in the substance.

The beast backed off of him. The knife was ripped from his neck violently, and he was yanked to his feet, before being thrown down again in the direction of the woman and child.

"Be sure that you do." The predator snarled. The prey did not look up as he left, but stay crouched on the ground with one hand over his neck wound. The horrible mark would scar, but he wouldn't be the first one to gain such grisly features. In fact, if anything he was lucky that it was just a short wound, and not a long, winding, burned one like his neighbor's wife had, the flesh knotted and grotesque.

An arm gripped his, helping him to his feet. The woman. She led him away, one arm draped tenderly over his shoulder, to a nearby shack, the child traveling close by his feet with her warm, small hand gripping one of his own. The claw marks on his chest left blots of blood on his clothes. A pity as well; they were new.

The door closed behind them. There were only five others in here; four men and another woman. He broke away from them, one hand still clutched over the knife mark. The other woman was cleaning a table, but stopped when they entered. Two of the men were sitting at the bar, but they stopped drinking and looked over when they entered, as did the bartender. The last man sat in a corner, feet kicked up on the table, face hidden by his hood, but he, too, stopped what he was doing(sharpening his knife; where did he get a knife?), and looked up as they entered.

The prey escaped from death looked at them all with suspicion, the woman and child most of all. The child heaved herself up to sit on a table, her legs swinging innocently, freely.

"Who are you? Why stop me?" he asked. His voice rasped slightly with pain.

"Concerned citizens. And because what I said is true; we need you." the woman said. "There's no point in dying for freedom if you don't die free."

"And what if I don't care?" he snapped. His family flashed briefly through his mind. His life spent trying either to live up to the name, or trying to forge separate expectation, to the point where he just felt like giving up. And after all that influence that came with that name... he got stranded out _here_ , alone.

" _Everyone_ cares." she countered. "From the ones who try to become martyrs, like you, to the smallest child who just wants to know what life would be like without the _Kett_."

She spat the word like it was poison in her mouth.

"Even if you are part of the resistance-and I know there is a _very_ low chance you actually managed to reach this far-why should I take the chance? There are six of you, and only one of me." He glowered at them all. He didn't recognize any of them, and he'd met many of the cells. "How can I be sure you aren't puppets for the Kett? That's six chances I'm taking that I can trust _any_ of you."

"Hey!" the child protested with a huff. "I'm number _seven_! Don't _I_ count?"

"It's six chances that you should be willing to take." the woman waved the child's comment off. "And you can at least rule me out; if I were a Kett lapdog, I would've let you die."

"Lapdog?" now there was a term he'd never heard before. Perhaps it was some kind of resistance thing?

"Just a word I've been hearing lately." she explained off-offhandedly. "And I was hoping to turn six into seven. Will you help me do that? I... have heard rumors about your family name."

"Eight!" the child pressed as he looked down at his blood-covered hand, thinking. He shut his eyes. Again, with his family. It couldn't hurt more either way.

"I guess whatever I choose, I'll be dead soon, won't I, if you are spys." he relented. He looked up at them tiredly. "Just... tell me where to meet you, for more information, or whatever it is you want."

"We can supply you with the tribute you need tomorrow. I'll bring it to you in the square." She told him. He muttered a thanks and made fore the door. As he opened it, however, he was stopped.

"Wait." he froze. "I entirely forgot to ask your name."

"It's Jaal."

He left. And, still sitting in the back, Evfra nodded silently to himself in satisfaction.

* * *

 **Just my little take on how our new fan-favorite got his scar. Not as epic as taking a missile to the face, but this is how I imagine it going down. And it _has_ been confirmed that the Angara resistance is fighting the Kett, a IGN thingy revealed a loud of stuff about Jaal yesterday; just in time for this post!**

 **And honestly, I think I'm going to explode. Andromeda's coming, and the new DEstiny update has me frothing at the mouth, and they both come out within a week of each other. GNNNN!**

 **Look up to tomorrow; Tali is going to('inadvertently') teach Legion bad manners!**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	7. Day 7

**On the seventh day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me;**

 **Seven Geth incidents!**

"I still can't believe she did that!" Garrus grumbled under his breath, wiping more mud from his face and flicking it at the wall as they walked through the mess.

"Shepard-Commander's intentional compromise of our squad was typical of her behavior." Legion pointed out, the Geth also covered in mud. Across the room, Miranda was staring at the threesome like she might be able to set them on fire, griping her mug with white knuckles as they tracked mud all over her nice, clean ship.

"Sending us into a mud pit just for kicks was a bit much." Tali was still trying to wipe an acceptable amount of the goop from her mask. "Ugh, it's getting in my filter. Gross..."

"Should we be worried about that?" Garrus asked nervously.

"Oh, the filters will make sure I don't get infected. But sterile, clean _mud_ , is still _mud_ , and it's all _goopey_ and _gross_." She let out a groan. "Oh, keelah; it's squishing on my skin every time I move. Urrg!"

"We need to get here back for this!" Garrus Pounded his fist into his hand, sending droplets scattering and making a sickening squishy sound.

"What is the purpose of pushing Shepard-Commander into a mud pit?" the Geth inquired. Tali shook her head.

"Not what we were saying. Just replace her toothpaste with blueberries or something." She waved him off, and marched towards the med bay, where her clean room was waiting.

The next morning, to her exasperation, Shepard would walk into the mess with a basket of blueberries, and announce that she 'appreciated the gift, but would like her toothpaste back.' Mysteriously, it would be Legion who 'found' the toothpaste.

* * *

When they entered, Anderson was already talking with the council.

"Ah, there she is. Shepard, would you like to deliver your new evidence tot he nice man?" The Human Councilor asked pleasantly. There were here to try, once again, to prove that Sovereign wasn't Geth technology. What better way than make them hear it from a real Geth and a Geth expert?

Much to Tali's dismay, it was Sparatus who was on the line. Shepard's annoyance was expressed with a light, mournful sigh.

"Great. It's Councilor Bosh'tet." the Quarian muttered, soliciting what qualified as an 'odd look' from Legion.

"Alright Councilor, you wanted proof Sovereign wasn't Geth tech, here it is." Shepard 's voice was already testy. "Legion?"

The Geth stepped forwards, stance as polite as a Geth with a giant hole ripped through it could get. And then...

"Greetings, Councilor Bosh'tet." It said. Shepard clapped her hand over her mouth, and Tali drew in a sharp gasp. _Oh, keelah; what have I done!?_ Anderson was now biting his knuckle, his chest shaking slightly with a faint noise as he tried to keep from laughing out loud.

"WHAT!?" Sparatus exclaimed furiously. Legion's eye plates flicked up.

"We assumed this was your title." It told him. "Soveriegn was not of Geth origin; we do not have the technology capable of making such a ship."

"Then obviously, the Geth who attacked us were much more advanced! Commander, you would do well to keep your trophy bot on a leash; it might have an ' _accident_ '." The Turian snarled. "This conversation is _over_!"

Legion flinched. It looked at Shepard. "Had chances for success lowered because of our factor?"

"No." Shepard was still trying to hold back snickers. "It was Tali who taught you that language!"

"I've created a monster." The Quarian sighed as Anderson's laughter released itself.

* * *

Vacationing on Illium. With a _Geth_ in tow. Not exactly something she thought she would ever be doing, but after the Omega Relay mission, Shepard had said they all deserved a break.

And stuck Tali and Thane with Legion-sitting duty. Mainly; keeping the Geth from being shot at, and keeping it from wandering off and doing something... strange. In a constant effort to try and understand organics, Legion and it's computer logic often took things literally.

 _I need a nap._ She yawned beneath her mask, but alas; where Thane and Legion went, she had to follow. Even into the fancy open-air restaurant that Thane wanted to visit; apparently, they served meals specially for biotics that he enjoyed greatly.

"This unit does not require sustenance." Legion commented as they made their way through the door.

"This is just for Thane; this place doesn't look like it serves dextro-friendly. Just do what I do." she yawned, making her way to one of the back tables. She pulled out a chair, tested it's reclining capabilities, then sat with her feet kicked up on the table, her hands cushioning her head. Snatching a magazine off the table, she put it over her mask to block out the light, gunning for at least a short doze.

Legion looked at her, and then at one of the other chairs. It pulled the seat out, and attempted to copy her position, unaware of the entire restaurant staring at it as it propped it's legs up on the table. One woman took a picture with her omnitool, posting it on her page, labeling it: Real or Fake? It glanced at Tali again, and then tried to affix a magazine over it's eye light in a similar manner, only for the article to fall of onto it's chest. It looked up at Thane, who was standing in front of the two with his plate in hand, looking amused.

"Tali, it is considered bad manners to put your feet on the table." he rasped.

"I went on a suicide mission; I don't need to be a good girl." she grumbled sleepily.

"Think of the _children_." he insisted with mock weariness. "You're teaching Legion bad table manners!"

Tali slid the magazine off her face by a fraction to peer at the Geth, who flicked it's eye plates up at her questioningly, the magazine still flopped lifelessly on it's chest, it's body still reclined in mirror of her own relaxation.

" _I_ think it's an improvement."

* * *

"Okay... so tell me again how this happened?" Shepard asked, arms crossed, as Garrus inched out along the branch of the tree above and pulled out his combat knife.

"Well... I thought it would be a good idea to climb a tree, to get a better feel for out position." Tali explained as The Turian began to cut the vines. "I... well, Quarians don't climb trees."

"We volunteered to assist." Legion added helpfully... from where he was hanging upside-down, wrapped haphazardly into a bundle of Geth, vines, leaves, and small branches.

"And you didn't take into account that you, say, might have been too heavy for that branch?" The commander asked testily.

"Visual scans led to the conclusion that the branch could support the weight of this unit. We did not account for internal wood rot." the Geth told her. "We-"

The vines snapped, and it was sent crashing headfirst into the ground.

"Got it!" Garrus chirped cheerily from above. Legion stood, covered with leaves, scuffs, and now, mud. Tali stepped forwards and pulled a leaf out from between it's eye plates.

"Ugh, keelah you're a mess." she exclaimed. "No _way_ are you going back on the _Normandy_ looking like this!"

Shepard let out a sigh as Garrus jumped down the last few feet off the tree, her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose. "Come on, you three. Let's head back."

They started back towards the shuttle, passing a few Blue Suns corpses on their way. Another groan from Tali as she tried to pick a large burr of moss off of Legion; if there was one thing everybody knew about Tali'Zorah, it was that dirty tech bothered her to no end, to an extreme that put OCD to shame.

"Tali." Garrus put a hand on her shoulder, allowing the Geth to escape her grasp.

"What!?" she snapped at him.

"Stop mothering the Geth."

* * *

"Um... Garrus?" Shepard couldn't stop staring. The Turian's fringe had been dyed a shockingly bright pink. He looked up at her mopingly. Today, the crew would be splitting up and heading their separate ways. She could only imagine the questions he would be asked.

"Tali asked Legion to show her a picture of Rannoch. I said it looked desolate." He let out a mournful sigh. "Next morning I wake up and _this_ had happened."

"Tali punished you?"

"No. They both did it; I know it. She's got that Geth wrapped around her finger, I swear I saw them fist-bump earlier."

"Well, just try not to insult Rannoch anymore."

* * *

"What am I going to do with you?" Tali shook her head. "It's like things have hardly change at all!"

"We did not intend to cause distress among the crew." Legion shifted his feet. She couldn't put her finger on it quite exactly, but ever since rescuing him from that dreadnought, he seemed more... alive than he had when she last met him. He took things a little less literally as well.

Not to say there weren't still miscommunications.

"Well, um..." Copeland, too, shifted her feet, but with nerves. She'd pulled a gun on the Geth, who had, though as gently as possible, disarmed her and pinned her to the wall in defense.

"We will see to alerting the rest of the crew of our presence on board the _Normandy_." The Geth did a sort of shuffle. "We apologize for any long-term physical harm."

"Well, Gabby and Ken are in engineering, if you want to go talk to them." Tali told him. All Legion had known before with the Cerberus crew, but the two engineers were the only ones here from that line-up. "But, uh, stay away from Port Cargo. Don't even use the engineering door near it. In fact, why don't I come with you, just in case Adams freaks out."

The last thing she needed was for him to end up body-slamming Adams; or worse, running into Javik, who had made his opinion on the synthetic quite clear.

* * *

"Turian, why do you let the machine do that to you?" only a primitive would let the device continuously poke them in the shoulder such as the Geth was doing now.

"Tali told him to do it." The sniper drawled sadly, head propped up on one hand. "She seems entirely convinced that I'm hiding all the 'good dextro food'. Why don't you come over here and poke me yourself!?"

"Because, as Admiral, I have duties to preform before we assault Rannoch. Legion has free time." the Quarian called back from the other side of the command center.

"Just throw the machine out the airlock." Javik shrugged, shaking his head in disbelief. The Quarian was naive in trusting this 'Legion' so completely.

"Well, you're little attack dog is just going to have to keep poking me _forever_ then." Garrus reclined, ignoring the Prothean. "In fact, what do you get out of this, Legion?"

"Creator Zorah insists we are aiding in the pursuit of justice." Exasperation radiated so profoundly from the primitive, Javik could sense it without touching him.

"'Justice'? Really, Tali!? It's only food!"

"We also find this action gratifying." The Geth added. "Based off of social classifications, you are placed under the category of 'annoying'."

The expression on the Turian's face was completely blank, followed by a sudden burst of exasperated anger. He reached under his personal console, opened a compartment beneath it, and shoved a small package into Legion's hands.

"Take the cookies, and tell her I surrender."

* * *

 **I'm seriously so sorry for this, guys. I thought I posted this chapter, and I've been believably busy these last few days. I'll be doing a triple-update today to make up for it!**

 **There were many ways this chapter could have gone; it ended up being a series of small drabbles. I think the Illium one is my favorite, just because of the mental image of a Geth and a Quarian reclining like they're at a spa or something, even though poor Legion can't handle a magazine.**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	8. Day 8

**On the eight day of Andromeda,**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Eight white horses!**

Bailey was running. There was no way he was going out like this!

"Out of the way!" He yelled as loud as his lungs would let him as he dashed through the presidium commons. People screamed and ran to the side or for high ground as he came charging through.

"Tactus, activate the field on my mark!" He could hear them just behind him...

Bailey leaped to safety , one of his officers grabbing his arm and pulling him up onto the second level as he ran up the wall to reach the outstretched hand. Below, the eight white horses bayed, skidding to halts as they were led into a dead end.

"Now!" Bailey yelled into his comms. A kinetic field placed itself around the general area of the horses. They bayed and nickered, rearing and tossing their graceful head, trapped and nervous. He let himself lay flat on his back a few moments catching his breath.

This was the last time his was trusting an _Elcor_ to handle eight white horses. "O'Brian, put this on my list for 'most obscure animal mishandling incidents ever."

* * *

 **Because I couldn't write a Twelve Days countdown fic for Mass Effect and NOT include Bailey.**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	9. Day 9

**On the ninth day of Andromeda,**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Nine minutes counting!**

Parents dead at three, watching the world they'd been hiding on burn. First allowed to practice with a pistol when he was six; his hands had barely fit around the handle, his finger barely long enough to squeeze the trigger, but it was necessary. Throwing knives at targets at the age of ten, practicing tirelessly with his biotics at the age of twelve.

It was at age fourteen that they first shoved a rifle in his hand and called him 'solder'. It was necessary; their hiding place was under attack. It was a rallying point for the military, for some large assault planned against the Reapers that he was too young to know about. Yet. He would show them. The commander that gave him and the other teenagers rifles told them, 'make them pay'.

He took the words to heart. _Make them pay._ There could be no survivors, not one to bring word back to the Reapers of what was being planned here.

The battle lasted nine minutes.

 **0**

He ran out into the thick of the fight. Himself and the other teenagers, along with some lighter fighters; mostly newer solders. This was a token force, a sham. The idea was that if the attack failed, the Reapers might think this base not worth taking; that it was unimportant, if it didn't have a real guarding force.

The real guarding force was waiting in the base, perfectly safe, while he shot his first Reaper shell in the head. They were waiting either for an evacuation order, or the all-clear.

 **1**

Flying, eye-like aerial assault drones; the Gazers, as they called them. He shot one in the middle of it's 'eye'. It closed; no damage. Then it opened, and one of the older teenagers shoved him to the ground, getting blasted instead. Instead of running in horror, an idea came to mind, and he waiting.

There was a flash of red at the Gazer charged it's beam. He shot it in the eye, and the beam overloaded, causing it to explode. he wondered if all the other solders knew that trick? If they did, why hadn't they told him about it?

One of the few things he remembered his late uncle teaching him; talking only teaches you so much. In this war, your greatest lessons are learned on the battlefield. You might not like some of them.

 **2**

One of the familiar faces was sent flying with a hole blasted through her chest. There was no flare of mourning or grief; at least, no the way he expected it. It was there only for a fraction of a second, then is rose quickly to something else; anger.

He knew grief. Everyone did. These battlefields, his home, they all stank of it. Grief, anger, terror, defiance. A scream of a dying people. A scream he now added his voice to as he charged the empty shell of a sentient that had killed the familiar face, blasting his gun into it's stomach.

 **3**

They did not mourn innocence. No-one was truly innocent, not even the children. Not for long, anyway. The day came, very soon, when they saw their first death, or saw it in the memory of another, and then innocence was burned away so as to begin to meld the cold steel of a soon-to-be solder in this war of extinction. He threw his knife into the throat of another teenager; indoctrinated, somehow. She'd tried to stab him in the spine.

He didn't recognize her, she was new to this place, a refugee. That was how the reapers did their work; sneaking indoctrinateds through with the refugees. He'd heard the leaders of the camp considering closing the gates to any that came from space. Not until the incoming population was gone through with sharp eyes and strong reading.

 **4**

A beast charged through. A horrible mass, muddled together and stitched into one grotesque being by the Reapers from the parts of varying native predators. It's long neck, slavering jaw. Boney spine and dis-proportioned back legs, small in comparison to the from ones. Metal claws the sizes of himself, turrets mounted to it's shoulders.

He took cover from it's fire, as his fellows were cut down around him viciously. For a moment, one bleeding, fleeting moment, it was too much. His mind screamed out, he knew the other could sense his fear. What was he doing here? He was too young! Though with his uncle dead last month, there was no family left to miss him, the thought of his existence being silenced, for the first time, terrified him.

He was scared of dying. Of experiencing the pain he sensed all around him firsthand. Of becoming yet another face lost to this war, of becoming one of the faces he'd seen cut down the past few minutes, only to brush aside their deaths so long as the fight was going on. Why did this war do this? Why did he have to learn death and fighting so early?

Then the moment was past, and he ducked out of his cover behind his boulder, and ran to regroup with several overs behind a different formation, firing his rifle blindly at the Reapers as he ran, their bullets whizzing past him, one grazing the back of his head eerily. Anger replaced that moment.

 **5**

They Reapers were retreating. They couldn't let them. _No survivors._ On survivor could mean death for all at this base. He ran after them with the others of the defending force right on his heels. Was he in front?

"Take them! Take them all! Leave none left!" he called, the battle cry from a young mouth sounding strange to his ears. He was in front. Leading the charge. Something surged in his chest. Pride? No. Something else. "Make them pay!"

Belonging. This was where he belonged. Leading the charge for revenge against the Reapers. _Make them pay._

 **6**

The beast was still in play. They scattered as it turned on them. More shells, come from somewhere else. Some looked a little like his own kind, he notice for the first time. He'd always heard that that was what happened to solders who were captured alive, but he had never seen it done. He had never faced them before now; he'd always been shoved to the back of the group, for protection, as he was too young to handle a rifle.

He could handle one now. He could make them pay for it all. He would bleed them as they bled him, and everyone else. As he leaned out of cover to pick off another Gazer, using the same trick as before, he had a strange moment that felt like an epiphany.

He would destroy the Reapers. Once and for all; not just shells, the husks of those who had once been, but actual Reapers; the machines that were trying to kill his race. He would see their end once and for all. He would see a day where he would never have to fear the sound of one entering the atmosphere again. One day... he would see an illusion called peace.

Of all the moments in his life, for some reason, that one was the surest, as he killed that Gazer. If only he had known...

 **7**

The shells were thinning, but the beast was retreating! He couldn't let it get away. He ran after it, but several shells got in his way. A mass effect field sang around him, and he threw them all into the air angrily.

"Out. Of. My. WAY!" He screamed, using his other hand to rip them all apart with an opposing field. He kept running, following the beast to a ravine as his fellows kept fighting behind him. He didn't look back.

 **8**

Running along the edge of the ravine, he jumped onto it's back. Everyone else had tried a frontal approach; it was time to do something different. It bucked and thrashed beneath him, twisted it's neck around and grabbed him around the middle. He screamed as it's fangs sank into the soft cracks between his armor, and heard his plating starting to crack as it thrashed it's head around with him in it's mouth. The word was spinning, and he couldn't breath, and his vision was starting to go dark. One arm was caught in it's mouth, the other, he couldn't possibly hope to move in an effective biotic attack.

In a moment of clarity that came before unconsciousness, the arm trapped within the beasts mouth charged with biotics, and slammed his fist against the roof of it's mouth. It dropped him with a howl of pain, as a mass effect field dissolved it's brain and controlling cybernetic central nodes. He rolled on the ground, still gasping for breath, as it staggered and collapsed.

 **9**

He was having trouble getting back up the ravine. His ribs were broken, his leg was bleeding badly at this point. He used his biotics to cauterize it. The sounds of battle were fading. He let out a light swear as his feet slid in the mud again, sending him back into the ravine. He looked up at the sound of approaching footsteps, and returned his rifle to his hands, aiming at the edge of the ravine, waiting for the shell to come out.

It was not a shell, but the commander that had given him the rifle in the first place. He did not lower his gun, taught always to be suspicious.

"Prove to me you are who you present yourself to be!" he called up.

The commander looked down at him. Then looked at the slain beast that had killed dozens, only to fall to a child. There was an odd look in his eyes, and for a few moments, he thought he could sense... that his elder was impressed with what he had done. He still did not lower his rifle. The commander had naught a scratch on him; for all he knew the man was indoctrinated.

Then, he spoke.

"The fight is over. I killed the last shell just now." He raised his knife, covered in shell blood. "You made them pay."

He lowered his rifle slightly. The commander's eyes were intense, expectant, analyzing him. For what?

"I expect more of the same from you, Javik."

* * *

 **Part of me always wondered how our favorite fossil started out. Just to clarify, the Gazers are, in my head, what the Protheans called the Oculus we see in-game. The shells are the husks, because lets face it; they aren't going have the same words for this stuff as the new cycle does.**

 **Anyway, I'm hoping I did Javik a little justice in this chapter. He never really got much focus as a character, I feel.**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	10. Day 10

**On the tenth day of Andromeda**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **Ten, ways to troll!**

Now, I know some of you might be feeling a little... uneasy about being assigned to a Human ship. Having served on one myself many years ago, I find it imperative to educate the youth on creative ways to pass the time. Now, not everything on my personal list would work for you... some of the people involved with these action are dead, and therefor cannot partake in these items of interest.

So, I decided to take the ten best things from here, and show them all to you. A couple are edited, of course.

"1) Befriend the Geth. If you have him wrapped around you finger, you can get him to do all kinds of ways to play with the Humans. Replacing certain sound files with Reaper klaxons, for instance." My dearest Ambassador Tali'Zorah did this several times. When they started getting along, her and Legion became to what equated as 'friends'.

Friends as in 'trolling the entire crew' as a study on 'organic reaction time' because 'Creator Zorah said so'.

"2) Hide the coffee." Do this one at your own risk. According to several other species, the stuff is disgusting, but the Humans practically need it to survive. When they don't have it... it is NOT pretty. *muttering*I'm pretty sure Javik still has a scar...

Sorry, um, did I say that out loud?

"3) Beat box." And be annoying about it; there's no point in it at all if some Human doesn't get that little vein in their forehead popping up...

"4) Replace the standard elevator music with heavy metal Elcor grind core." this isn't so much a prank as it is a mercy to everyone.

Trust me on this.

"5) Good, old-fashioned 'kick me' signs." it's an old Human prank. Just write 'kick me' or something else on a sticky note, and discreetly tag it on someone's back.

"6) Hum the theme for 'it's a small world after all', but only the first seven notes." Just watch them; it drives them crazy every time.

"7) Put plastic wrap over the sink nozzle." The results are gratifying.

"8) Draw up schematics for a bayonet on the main gun of your ship. Leave it laying around, where people can see it. And when a certain nosy Prothean popsicle tries to peek at it, gather your things and walk away like it's a top secret project." Okay, _wow_ , this one is outdated. Though you can see the intended target of this particular incident, it'll work with just about everyone.

Try adding some go-faster stripes on your blueprints, though; for style factor.

"9) Get on the intercom and yell 'Alchika' as loud as you can." Trust me, the results... are _magical_. Be sure to get a vid of it.

"10) Walk around in a Grim Reaper costume for shore leave." In 2185, I once managed to get the entire alien crew to do this. We walked around in a pack, and got stopped by C-Sec multiple times.

We only got caught because they discovered one of us was a Geth. That's when we had to ditch the costumes and run, but Grunt's caught on fire at some point along the way, and Legion got punch in the face... by a guy with a prosthetic hand, so it actually did some damage. We nearly left poor Thane behind.

Ah... good times. Good times.

* * *

 **I think it's pretty obvious who wrote this... only Garrus would dare call Javik a Prothean-sicle.**

 **Dude, the game comes out tomorrow. Expect another chapter today; I was insanely busy yesterday, so I didn't have time to post this.**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	11. Day 11

**On the eleventh day of Andromeda,**

 **My true love gave to me:**

 **11% of a plan!**

"You call that 'figured it out'!?" Tali seemed to puff up with exasperation. "We're going to _rob_ the guys who just beat us senseless?"

"You want to talk about senseless?" Garrus shot back. "Talk about trying to save me... by _blowing me up_!"

"We were only going to blow you up if they didn't turn you over!" She crossed her arms over her chest. After the Turian's ship had been blown up so Saren's lapdog could get the Key to the Conduit from him, his helmet had malfunctioned, and Aria had captured him.

"How were they supposed to turn me over, if you only gave them five seconds!" he yelled. Tali's adoptive 'sister' had been the one to blow him up. A twisted combination of Terran flesh and metal named Jack.

"We didn't have time to work out the _minutiae_ of the plan. This is what we get for acting altruistically"

"Our assistance is unappreciated." The Geth sitting to her left interjected. Found by the Quarian shortly after her escape from Harbinger's clutches, her suit's systems rendering any indoctrination techniques inert. He wondered how the unlikely friendship had formed.

"You're right, Legion; he _is_ ungrateful."She nodded in agreement.

"What's important now is we get Terminus army to help us save the Citadel." The pacing Turian in the center of the room rubbed one hand over his face.

"So we can give the Key to Aria, who will just sell it to someone worse?" Thane pointed out. An assassin originally hired to get the Key for Saren, before finding out the truth behind the device. He'd agreed to help them get rid of it.

"We'll figure that part out later."

"We have to stop Saren. How?"

"I have a plan."

"You've got a plan?"

"Yes."

"Okay, first off, you're copying me from when I said I had a plan." Tali tossed her head, crossing her legs, and straightening her back.

"No I'm not." he spread his arms in exasperation. "People say that all the time; it's not that unique a thing to say."

"Second off," she continued, ignoring him, "I don't think you even have a plan."

"I have.." he started with a raised voice, only to hesitate and speak lower, mandibles flickering slightly,"... _part_ of a plan!"

"What percentage of a plan?" Javik demanded. A notorious _fossil_ with an incredible temper, out to avenge his people, known for slaughtering minion after minion of Saren's.

" _You_ don't get to ask questions after the nonsense you pulled back on Omega." The Prothean had drunk himself under the table, and _called_ Saren. 'Drunk biotic Prothean-sicle' versus 'freakishly cybernetically enhanced super-Turian' had, unsurprisingly, ended badly.

"I just helped save the Turian!" all four eyes narrowed in indignation.

"We just established, blowing up the ship that I'm on is not saving me." Garrus reminded him. His top set of eyes blinked.

"When did we establish that?" he asked.

"Like, three seconds ago." Garrus scratched at his forehead plate, fringe spiking in irritation.

"I was not listening; I was thinking of something else." the Prothean muttered in barely audible admittance.

"She makes a point; you've proven to be a poor decision-maker." Thane agreed with Tali.

"What percentage?"

"...Twelve percent?"

Tali burst out laughing.

"That's fake." Garrus drawled, fringe drooping in indignation. "That's a fake laugh."

"It's real!" Tali snapped, leaning on her knee in a tomboyish manner.

"Totally fake." The Turian shook his head.

"That was the most real, authentic, hysterical laugh of my entire life, because _that_ is not a plan!" She insisted angrily.

"It is hardly a concept." Thane agreed.

"It is preferable to eleven percent." Legion pointed out.

"What the heck does that have to do with any of this!?" Tali threw her arms up in exasperation. Garrus clapped the Geth on the shoulder.

"Thank you, Legion." He looked at the rest of them challengingly. He didn't notice the Geth start tracking an insect as it flew nearby. "See; Legion gets it. he's the only one of you that understands."

"There is a moth." Legion pointed to the bug with one finger, still watching it closely. Tali buried her mask in her hands with a muttering of 'keelah'. Garrus sighed.

"Alright, look. Aria's gonna be here in like, two seconds, and she needs to hear this plan of ours. I need your help. I look around me, and you know what I see? _Losers_." he said. They all looked up at him, eyes narrowed, and he quickly corrected himself. "I mean, people who've lost stuff. And we have. Man, we all have. Friends, family... parts of ourselves we can never get back. And usually, life takes more than it give, but not this time. This time... it's giving us a chance."

"To do what?" Tali asked quietly.

"To give a Thresher's butt." he told her, eyes like steel. "For once, not run away. For one... I'm not going to stand by and let Saren unleash the Reapers on the galaxy."

"Garrus... stopping Saren..." the young Quarian shook her head. "It's not possible. you're asking us to die."

"Yeah." he let out a heavy sigh, running one hand over his fringe and turning his back. "Yeah... I guess I am..."

"Garrus." He turned his head around to see Thane rising calmly to his feet. "I have spent my entire life taking things out of this world. Some were bad, others, not. All of them contracts I was bound to, none of them my choice to take out. But this... I would be grateful to die saving billions."

"For a primitive..." Javik also rose," you posses skill. A higher potential. I would enjoy avenging my people beside you... and in the end, I will join them."

"The Old Machines believe that they are preserving life by harvesting organic civilizations. They are in severe error." Legion got to his feet quickly, eye plates bristling. "They preserve the memory of a species; but the species is not alive. We have observed this; to live as something you are not is not to live at all. The Reapers are not alive. And to add to this, the heretics are our responsibility. We wish to correct the critical error. We wish to preserve organic life, by letting organics die naturally. That is how you live."

The four all looked at Tali, who was still sitting. She sighed in defeat, then gave an amused snort.

"Oh, what the heck. We'll all be dead by tomorrow night anyway." She got up, and spread her arm out. "There; now I'm standing. You all happy now? Bunch of _bosh-tets_ , standing in a circle."

* * *

 **I had to! I just imagine this scene in my head yesterday and it HAD TO HAPPEN! I had to write it with ME characters! I couldn't not!**

 **I really hope I fit the characters in here well. As always, I enjoyed more Legion! You guys can probably tell I love writing him. I was tempted to re-name him "Chitika" in this seeing as Tali found him and EDI doesn't exist... oh well.**

 **It's coming tomorrow! Like with Twelve Days of RoI, there will be a thirteenth 'concluding chapter' after the Twelfth Day.**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	12. Day 12

**On the Twelfth day of Andromeda,**

 **My true love gave to me;**

 **Twelve points of pride!**

Gunfire sang all around them as they ducked for cover. Garrus felt a bullet graze his shields as he pressed his back against the barrier he was hiding behind. Beside him, Grunt swore loudly.

"Well, what now!?" he barked.

"Grunt, I can't believe i'm saying this, but..." Garrus sighed, closing his eyes. "Do it."

A manic spark burned through in his silver-blue eyes, and Thane looked at the Turian with a 'are you crazy' sort of face. Garrus shrugged. There was only one way they were going to kill twelve Abominations without getting killed themselves...

"Hey! Pyjaks!" Grunt strode into the open, slinging the Cain off his back. Common belief was that Grunt using the Cain would rip a hole in reality, and extinguish peace in the universe for decades to come.

With a maniacal laugh, the Krogan charged up the weapon as the Collector Abominations turned to face him and screeched. They held up their arm cannons, and Grunt let the round fly.

"He, he, he..." The abominations went sky-high, and the Krogan looked on, eyes burning with pride as he stroked the side of the gun tenderly.

* * *

 **Slightly inspired by RavenStudios ME adaptation where Grunt has an obsession with the Cain. I swore, yet again, that I posted this yesterday...**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


	13. New Faces, Old Stories

_The time has come,_

 _To say farewell..._

Sara Ryder sat in the mess hall, feet propped up on the table, reclining as she read over the latest status updates on the outposts on Eos, taking a sip from her coffee every so often. It was early in the morning, and the sleepy crew members were going through their waking routines.

Peebee was approaching the coffee maker, yawning, slouching from head to fuzzy-slippered toes, still dressed in baggy panda-print nightcloths that Suvi had kindly lent her. Vetra walked out of crew quarters, stretching, almost cat-like as she stretched one leg out behind her at a time and flexed her talons.

 _To old friends dear,_

 _And old lands familiar..._

Cora was already dressed and looked ready to kill, eyes bright and sharp as she went over the duty rosters for the day. Kallo and Suvi were talking animatedly to one another as they made their way up to the cockpit.

Gil was bidding the night shift engineering team goodnight(or rather, good day), gathering his eager 'apprentices', the Rivers siblings; a happy-go-lucky brother and sister duo the sight of which sent a pang through her own heart.

They reminded her so much of herself and Scott...

 _And you, new hero,_

 _Must fill these shoes, so large for your too-little feet..._

Drack plopped himself down next to her with a wide, loud yawn, his platter covered with food, the chair groaning in pain as the old Krogan sat.

"You should put that down; enjoy your food." he suggested, setting his tray down and popping an apple whole into his mouth. He pointed at her bowl of oatmeal, sitting cold and forgotten, barely half-eaten. "Mornings are for eating, kid; not reading."

She shook her head with a huff of amusement. "What can I say; these reports are interesting. Besides; I have to. Never got around to reading them last night."

 _Big shoes... such big shoes..._

 _Who would give such big shoes, to such little feet?_

"No- the Bishops move diagonally, in any direction. The Rooks can only go along a straight line of squares." Liam corrected from his table. Across from him sat Jaal, who was puzzling over the Chess board set between the two of them. A smile crept across her face before she could stop it; the Angara was determined to learn the game.

And Liam was more than happy to teach. So long as they didn't turn his room into a boiling oven like they had during their diplomatic project. She swore, she would never understand the crazy things men did sometimes...

 _Can you grow to fill this legacy?_

 _Do you have the strength?_

An odd and sudden thought came upon her, as she watched her crew. Call it an epiphany, call it deja-vu, call it a moment when she realized...

This was a new start. A new start to a new journey, with an old name. Maybe that name was exploration, or maybe it was something else. There were no heroes... not yet. There were no medals, no well-known names. Just a new, hodge-podge crew telling a new tale, with new faces but with that one old name in common.

It was an old story, of a ship and her crew, off to fight the monsters in the night, off to find all the old secrets. But is was new faces. A new ship, and a new crew, far, far away from the oldest story, of the place of their beginning.

It was, indeed, a very odd and sudden thought. But for some reason, to Sara Ryder...

It made sense. It sounded right.

 _Straighten your back._

 _Gather your courage._

 _Take one last look back,_

 _At all the old heroes._

 _Then settle your bag on your shoulders._

 _Carefully holster your gun._

 _You have far a journey to walk, little feet,_

 _Before your title is won._

* * *

 **And here ends the legend of the trilogy. All our beloved characters have moved on to greener pastures, and I hope this final countdown managed to do them justice.**

 **That being said, Which one of these chapters was your favorite? Which one made you laugh the most? Which one made you cry? Which one felt the most powerful to you, personally?**

 **I won't lie; I'm gonna miss the originals. I think the trilogy will always have a place in every ME player's hearts. I think it's also important to note, despite all the flak Bioware is getting: ME was never known for it's great animation in it's first place. It was always about the stories, the characters, the interactions. And Andromeda is a HUGE freaking game; there are bound to be errors and limitations.**

 **It was cool to finally meet Garrus' dad, though; it only took, like, four installments, and they're all dead by this time anyway.**

 **Hope you guys all enjoyed this, and I _will_ be continuing How to Be A Rogue! I haven't forgotten it! And yes, Sarcasm, I am planning on doing a Twelve Days fic for Destiny 2.**

 **Read and REVIEW!**


End file.
